twothirds

Sunday’s dinner was Spicy Vietnamese Crab and Garlic Noodles. The concept was good, but it is one of those meals where the effort and cost overwealm any potential enjoyment.

The crab was procured live from the local market. This gave me the pleasure of being judge, jury and executioner. I followed some directions off the interweb and…

First, place the crab on it’s back and hold it in place with a large cleaver or french knife positioned on the center-line of the crab, between the two sets of legs. Strike the cleaver a sharp blow with a rubber mallet or similar tool; chopping the crab in half and killing it instantly.

I lack a rubber mallet, but a rolling pin was a great substitution. Previous adventures with live crab had me follow directions of, “…strike the head against a hard object and rip off its top shell.” Yikes! Not easy.

At this time I should point out that a recently live crap cut in half will have involuntary muscle spasms. This is common sense and I was already equipped with this knowledge, yet I still let out a “little girl scream” as 1/2 a crab body managed to leap out of my hand during cleaning.

Without too much fuss, I was able to de-leg the crab, cut into quarters and pan fry it. Aromatics were added and it was placed on top of noodles. The finished product looked yummy, but then I remembered I had to de-shell the beast.

I always enjoyed crab as a child. I am not sure why it seems like so much more work these days. Maybe my hands are too big? Either way, after 30-minutes of cracking, poking, cursing and swearing, I was finally ready to eat.

I would make this meal again, but I would use bulk lump crap to save time and money. I do enjoy the taste of crab–I just hate all the fuss required to enjoy it.